Today, I was an animal

"We cannot live the afternoon of our lives as we did the morning." -Stephen W. Smith

This morning I felt like this:









Yes, like a fat turtle that just got beat up.



Had I known that my day would end so well, I would have smiled more this morning but I didn't.

Around 1pm my day somehow just started to turn around. It's amazing what change of scenery can do to a person (I love studying at my dad's office!^^)

So, in the afternoon I felt like this:











Yes, like a tiny monkey with glasses.


After, I tutored my little pupil (so cute!), drove into the city for a meeting, then I unexpectedly stayed longer than I anticipated and went to Chi-Town with some fellow board members for some Pho and can I just say, there really are some decent people on this Earth. I cannot doubt for a second that God does not pick and choose the people He surrounds me with. He always puts me with good people. Made me smile =)

I felt like this on the drive back home:








Yup! Like a little bunny in someone's hands (God's hands!).



Thanks for taking care of me, God. I know I complain a lot, if not out loud in my brain.
I know I am insecure, too, but you keep me anyway and always remind me that you're keeping me. Please keep me forever ^_^

Smile Big,
E.H.

Confronting Nothing

"It is nothingness that I have to face in my solitude." -Henri Nouwen

I wonder what Barack Obama thinks about when he's by himself at the end of the night, about to sleep, in his bed.
I wonder what Genghis Khan thought about in his solitude, his many, many days in prison, in silence.
And what about Bill Gates?
Or Oprah Winfrey?
Or Martin Luther King Jr.?
Or...you?

Why do we like to keep busy so much and cry out for rest or peace and quiet?
Why do we allow the hustle and bustle of our very own thoughts, that are quite often more odd or disturbing than not?
Why do we feel obligated to "become something"?
Why do we get involved in things?

What is your motivation to do anything? Is it God? Is it your pride? Your greed? Your parents? Your friends?
What makes you feel more substantial, that by taking on another mountain of sorts you became something else or that you are simple little you and nothing else?

What's so bad about being simple little you and nothing else?
When did we start feeling like being simple little us was bad?
Why do we feel like being simple little us is bad?

Simple little you is wonderfully and fearfully made.
Go ahead, find quietness, find solitude.
Nothingness is never really nothing because even nothing is something.

THAT made me smile today. Thanks God ^_^

Smile Big,
E.H.

Move Along!

"Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along."
-"Move Along" by All American Rejects

In high school, I was the first amongst my closest friends to get a driver's license and I didn't have a fancy shmancy MP3 player with an adaptable thingy until much later. So, to get my music fix, I had my friends make me mixed CDs named after them to have in my car. Well, it's been 5 years since then and I'm not the neatest chick on the planet...so those CDs are all over the place. And since then, I've been hooked on NPR and Praise 103.9 (man, hve times changed...). Well, yesterday my brother dug up one of my mixed CDs from my friend Mina and there's this song I forgot even existed, "Move Along" by All American Rejects.

I LOVED this song back in high school because it was fun to sing along with, I didn't think about what it meant. Well, I think it's just because of the period of my life I'm in, trying to make every moment count and meaningful, but yesterday I found myself really connecting with the message of this song and appreciating it.

"So a day when you've lost yourself completely
Could be a night when your life ends
Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving
All the pain held in your
Hands are shaking cold
Your hands are mine to hold"

What comforting words and so true! It reminded me of my relationship with Christ, how he's also prodding me to move along even when life seems dramatically horrible and lame.

Your hands are mine to hold.
I love that line! So sweet.

Okay, Go listen to it now:



(FM (more like CHAN, because I know you're the only one who reads this from FM)...you guys should consider doing this song next semester! ^_^ Hehe I would arrange it...but I don't got that kind of skill yo)


Smile Big,
E.H.

It's called "TODAY"

"I am a dreamer
Take me higher
Open the sky up
Start a fire
I believe
Even if it's just a dream"
-"Dreamer" by Bethany Dillon

Must I take my head out of the clouds?
It's just nicer there.
The sun is always shining above the clouds.

I feel like it's been one hit after the next.
As soon as I recover...BAM! Knocked down.
But, maybe I shouldn't complain because none of the doors have closed.
I'm not seeing the end.
Which, truly, could only mean that it's not the end.
And I just have more steps to take.

Okay, so I'll take my head out of the clouds for a little bit tonight so that can remember today. As soon as my head hits the hay, back to dreaming!

Things that made me smile:
-The pear that saved my life (Thanks Andrew!...Even though you will never see this!)
-Recording in the studio with Chan & Andrew, Scott & Matt
-"By Your Side" by Tenth Avenue North
-Finding the mixed CD Mina made me back in high school
-The flexibility of my job and encouragements from my boss
-Baking cookies
-Steak and veggie dinner mommy made for me
-IKEA's newest chairs
-Dancing with the Stars
-My glasses (I felt like my contacts were going to suck off my eyeballs! EW!)
-Being at Wegmans
-Spending time with Colette and PHA
-Buying turkeys for the first time

Things I need to work on:
-Being present and concerned for the NOW
-Discipline
-Sticking it out, especially when it's tough
-Waiting
-Stop questioning

I'm so excited to switch my Invisalign tray tomorrow! It's my 3rd set!
3 down, 10 more to go!

Smile big,
E.H.

5 Second Rule

Hehe, I know this picture may make you think that I'm referring to that rule when you drop food on the floor and consider it good-to-eat if you pick it up in the quick 5 seconds its on the ground. But, I'm not. Today was one of those downward domino days, one bad thing leads to the next bad thing, to the next bad thing. And before you know it, you're driving down a road that is closed for construction with a horrible rattling noise from a flat tire you're praying will magically heal itself by pumping air back in, messing up your day. REJECTION. (Hence, the cute little "talk to the hand" picture!)

God picks such crucial moments to sit you down (literally, I was sitting in my car seat) and quiet everything around you (again, literally had to shut off my engine and sit in the middle of a closed off neighborhood entrance where no one can enter). And he gave me the "new" 5-Second Rule:

Now, depending on the kind of situation you are in, it could take longer but here are the steps I took during my "5-seconds":

1. STOP! Get something to write on/type on and write down everything that has gone wrong
3. BE HONEST about how you are feeling and what you are thinking. No one is around to scold you for being the way you simply are.
4. Repeat what you wrote to God
5. Think about the worst thing that can happen to you, which for most people in all extreme cases is DEATH.
6. Touch your face. If you can feel your face, you are probably still alive. Good for you. Pat yourself on the back.
7. Since you reminded yourself that you have not faced the worst of the worst, all those awful things still might make you feel stinky, but REMIND YOURSELF there is hope yet to make things right.
8. Breathe and move forward.

Hehe, I know, I know! This is pretty silly, but honestly...this is what I did in my car as I waited for my mom and AAA to come and save my ass! And you know what? God restored a little bit more joy and hope in my heart than I had started out with today.

You know how they say, "Hey, it's not the end of the world"? It's TRUE (to some extent). And honestly, as I was driving home, I was so thankful because even if I did die I know exactly where I am going! And where I'm headed ain't so bad :P

Okay, so it's just 2:12pm, Friday afternoon. I still have time to do what I can. I still have time for God to change me and work in me.

So remember the next time you're feeling frustrated, discouraged, or anxious: 5-Second Rule!
Take the 5 seconds to Stop, think, be honest, pray, and count your blessings. It's easier than makin' pie!

Eat your veggies, kids!

Smile Big,
E.H.

Hehe, his name cracks me up...

Uncle Kracker- "Smile"


This song is so cute. I love it!
I heard it for the first time in the car today.
I thought he said, "You make me frown upside down" and thought it was really clever. But he didn't. So, I guess I'm clever. HAHAHA =P JK!

Today was a better day. I had a much needed talk with an older friend who put things into perspective and that I'm not crazy. I'm a control freak who is disguised as crazy. =P

Turn your thoughts into prayers, kids!
Always keep the Lord near to you.

Make a frown upside down,
E.H.

Tough Times

=( I know this is supposed to be a smiley blog, but the past two days have been emotionally taxing. I don't understand why I keep reacting in such a horrible way. I tell myself, I pray to God all the time that I'm going to be better, that God will make me better... =( It's so hard to break away and turn your face against anger and frustration.

My heart is really ugly right now. It needs an extreme makeover.

Counting my blessings,
E.H.